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| So, as of Wednesday,
April 30th, I have a license. But that's not to say that is what
changed things. My previous girlfriend, dubbed Ex-Girlfriend of 2002
(for identity's sake), and I had many an experience that will forever
remain in my mind. I learned quite a few things, and so did she, I'd
pray. Yet, we had started dating way before the slaughter of attempting a
license. More on that hell whole of a process, later. I was
love struck, without being in love. Quite the paradox: Love is a tricky thing. You have "love" and then the ever more popular "in love." "In love" is a scary threshold. You've crossed in the forbidden zone. (At least, in high school / college) You see, when you go to loving someone: to love their looks, their charm, their personality, and what not, you're okay with breaking up or the interminable "next step." Too close, and you've set yourself up for a rough breakup. Too far, and the partner thinks you're not interested. But "in love"? You're between a rock and haystack with a stone and a bushel.... Don't ask. "In love" can be thought of as reciprocal. Heck, "in love" is coined with the idea of being "in love" with another person. Yet if that love of yours is nothing more than a somewhat intrigued warm body, then you're no more than a fool. A fool in love with the possibility of being "in love", and no more. That's why kids like myself should just have fun with what they have. Live in the moment. Go on dates if you're into having fun, and seriously date one person if you're liking the idea of being "in love." Don't get me wrong. "In love" has its ups, too. If it's strong as oak, the relationship, I mean, then you're in love for good. Very few circumstances can stop that real, unmarred feeling. She's your oxygen. And without it, you might just find yourself staring at a white rubber wall... with rats... and rubber wheels... you'll go crazy. I've left my other "thoughts" on this website with a moral or suggestion, so I'll persist. Don't give your heart away too easily, or at least not all of it at the same time. If you let a relationship grow, God'll nurture what needs to be continued. One of my best friends sent me this quote, and I can think of no better one to sum up love. "Don't listen to your
head, for it is confused.
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